14 Stations to Number 1

cracks
Originally uploaded by shutternewbie 

I had an almost tragic accident a couple of days ago and it involved the subway and a pair of tight long johns.

One of the very basic training I got from nursery school is to empty my bladder before going on a long trip. That particularly cold day, I deliberately ignored my conscience and went down the TTC rails with a full amber juice bag. As soon as I sat down and the subway doors closed, I felt the sudden force of uncontrollable urge to open the dam. My tight thermals were only good for the cold and now served as compression stockings, squeezing my internal organs in. I was in dire need of help. I concentrated on slowly standing up, hoping that the lighter pressure would slow down the process...and it did.

I ran up the next station hoping to find a room to swat the urge. Unfortunately, I just got lost in the large station and nobody really knew where the washrooms are. So I got on another train hoping to see a sign of salvation in the next stop. To add insult to injury, the coach I was on was traveling at a speed slower than a seniors' parade. We finally reached a stop where I thought I'm more familiar with. I got off, ran up the stairs and frantically looked for any stick figures sign pointing to a panic room. And there was none. So I went out of the station, ignored the red lights and ran towards heaven...the mall. I spent the next few seconds diluting a blue chemsearch block.

There are several "I should've" moments that evening, but someone needs to experience it for others not to emulate, right? Or maybe I'm just too weak to face the fact that I did some stupid decisions, so crucify me if you will.

For really lazy people who wants everything easy, CLICK HERE.


GTGL8RZ!

What is there to do on a freezing weekend?

watching the snowstorm 01
Originally uploaded by shutternewbie 

It's been in the minus teens again for the past couple of days and it's a reminder that I'm still in North America every morning as I try to force my body out of bed. People tell me that I'm never gonna get used to the cold but I can make the whole experience less of a hassle. Of course, I'm not going out to run around the oval just across from here. That's never gonna happen!

There are more fun things to do when it's freezing out without even spending a penny:

1. If you have one of those crappy DVDs that you never really bought coz it came free with a new TV or player, try watching it again with the "Director's Commentary" on. Should be interesting, especially if the director sounds so convinced that a shot was amazing, when in fact, it's just a close up of a butt zit.

2. If you're feeling naughty and have been thinking of getting back at an embarrassing prank an old pal did to you, I have a nasty idea. Download a pic from his facebook then upload and start an ad on craigslist's missed connections that says something like "are you the guy who did not flush the toilet after a big dump in the mall?" That should teach him a lesson, and I'm pretty sure you'll get more than a handful of replies. That should keep u busy in the cold night.

3. Dance, dance, dance...this always keeps me warm. To get you started, here's a vid inspired by a song from Jerry Springer, The Opera:



(vid courtesy of BGDVA)


GTGL8RZ!